Thursday, February 14, 2013

13 weeks in

I've come to realise recently that in this world there are sharers and non-sharers.

Let me explain as this has nothing to do with the principle your parents taught you about your toys. 

Sharers are those people who fill your newsfeed on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook etc. Simply put, they like to share their life - what they ate, cooked, pictures of their children, wedding, holidays. Good on them too, it's what makes my Facebook a great procrastination tool. 

Then there are the non-sharers, typically the kind of people who will roll their eyes at selfies, delete newsfeed cloggers and update their status every 3 - 4 months. They are more intriguing as you want to know what's going and they simply don't share it. 

There are also over sharers, another kettle of fish altogether. Let’s leave that for another time shall we? 
Further to my thoughts on this topic I have discovered that I'm a sharer and Anthony is a non-sharer. You'll notice this in most couples. Interesting that God always puts two very different people together but more on that later. 

 I'll wear the share tag proudly though. I like to share, especially being in a new phase of my life which means when I finally perfect a meal or see my chilli plant thriving I like to tell the world about it. 

I will share almost everything, except the contents of my dinner plate (seriously, do not take food off my plate it won't end well).

Anthony does not like not sharing. In fact, he doesn't like sharing so much that he won't really like me sharing about his non-sharing ways. 

In the 4 years that we've known each other I've realised Anthony is a morning person. The worst kind. A chirpy, happy morning person who gets things done at 6am and doesn't understand why that isn't normal. 

I am a night owl, coming alive late at night and the grumpiest person you will ever meet before 8am. 

Try having a conversation with Anthony at 10pm. Hilarious, dazed mumbles are all you will get. 

Anthony is tidy, I express myself through organised chaos. (he sometimes refers to this as being 'messy')
Anthony walks fast, I like to stop and smell the roses. 
Anthony likes to get to airports 3 hours early, I prefer 30 mins. 

So why am I sharing this with you?

Let's face it, these are the sort of things that could cause some strain in relationships. The roots of silly little arguments, the grounds for annoyance. I've only been married 13 weeks but I get that this could become something BIG. 

In hindsight though, doesn't it sound a bit ridiculous that it could cause an argument?

Why on earth would we get annoyed at our spouse for something that is simply just in their nature and a part of their God-given DNA. 

Sometimes it could have been the very reason we fell in love with someone to begin with. 

When we were dating, I loved Anthony's neat nature, his punctuality, the fact that he walked with a purpose to get somewhere. 

Another piece of pre-marriage advice was this:

"In the first year of marriage, you will find a hundred reasons why you should be apart but through that what you have to remember are the reasons you are together" 

I'm thankful that I can say I haven't found a reason for Anthony and I to be apart, that seems a little drastic but I do see the point of this. The man can make me crazy but in the midst of a silly argument I remind myself of the man Anthony is and why we seem to fit so well together. A great match like salt and pepper or bread and butter. Just two loving opposites walking through life. 

Corinthians tells us that love is eternal, that it is patient and it doesn't demand its own way, it isn't selfish or proud or rude.  

These things are tough to live up to but remembering that you can tap in to an eternal source of love helps make some of this remotely possible. 

You and I were made in the image of love. Relief. You're not far from perfect love because God is never far from you. 

Now, if you are sharer, I'd love you to share your story with me. 

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